Have you ever thought, “What the heck? Why am I doing this?” I have! I have watched other mother colleagues get their houses clean, go out with their friends, get the things done they want to do, earn money and take naps. I will admit,I have experienced that green feeling on occasion. For heaven’s sake, I’m almost fifty years old and I still have two boys I am homeschooling. Both have special needs. They each are harder than my first four combined. I have been doing this for almost thirty years. Normal people retire after twenty-five. But it’s not just that, I am not the responsible type.
I don’t like having to be responsible for everything. It would be so nice to just let someone else be responsible for my children’s education. I mean, the state is offering, so why not? In fact, they want to take responsibility for them. To some degree, I even feel a little judged because I won’t let the state take responsibility for my children’s education. It would just be so much easier, not only will I be free to pursue my own life but I will also be free of that underlying, uncomfortable that I am just a little weird.
And then there are my boys. What about them? Wouldn’t they be so much better off if they just went to school. They would actually be able to spell, write and calculate. They would finally “fit it.” Wouldn’t it be better for them? Some of you out there are already laughing. You are saying, “Come on Aneladee, you don’t really believe this stuff.” Others of you are saying, “You go girl. Right, on all account!” You are the ones I probably need to have a little sit down with. So let’s sit down here and have a little pow wow.
Take a deep breath. You are going to be just fine. I want to give you three reasons why you need to keep doing what you are doing.
One –If all you ever learn and do in this life is how to be a fantastic mother and actually do it, you will have learned and done all there is to learn and do in this life.
Two –God didn’t give the state this responsibility. He gave it to you. You will have to return and report, not the state.
Three – They are going to be just fine.
Let me expound just a little and then I will get off your back. Let’s first talk about learning and doing motherhood. Homeschooling is not the only way to learn and do motherhood but for people like you and me, obviously God thinks it is the right way. So stop comparing your experience with some else’s. Comparison is a joy killer. Instead, let’s make a list of some of the important things you are learning. – Humility, meekness, patience, long suffering, hungering and thirsting for the spirit and his guidance, mercy, peacemaking, virtue, all the things you didn’t learn in school, how to negotiate through your negative emotions, how to recognize the voice of the spirit, how to recognize the voice of the adversary, love, acceptance for differences, household management, keeping the house tidy even with kids actually living in it all day. Wow, praise God!
Second, I know that government officials think that they need to hold us accountable to them but they don’t. WE are accountable to God and no one else. We must do what God tells us. Believe me, one size does not fit all and it doesn’t matter how many different ways they try to do the same thing, it is still the same thing. They want to train our children to get jobs. We are doing so much more with them than that. I will be writing a lot more about this in further posts. For now, let’s just call this a culture thing. I want to be in charge of the culture in my home, not them.
Third, all education is self-education. They are going to be just fine. The prevailing trend in education puts so much pressure on the basics. I am not telling you that this isn’t important. You do need to teach them how to spell and calculate. It is the struggle of homeschooling. It seems that those things that require so much consistency are the things they resist the most and the things that cause us mother’s so much strife. It’s okay. They will learn it. I promise. You are teaching them to love learning and to have the desire to learn it. But most important you are teaching them how to think and plan for the future. You can do it! When they gain the desire, be there. Hand it to them! Give them the reason to spell and calculate first.
Stop the freak out! You can do this! And always remember, what we cannot do by ourselves, we can do together. Let’s stick together!
by Aneladee Milne